Behaviour: How to have a little more patience and kindness in
the New Year
Every day I want to get more done, every day I want more hours just to finish anything fully. Yet the time in a day never changes, it is a constant non changing amount of time. I am one of those rushed people always racing to get somewhere or get something done. I don’t want to be rushed anymore. I want to slow down a little. Earlier this year after witnessing an event that stopped me in my tracks; a realisation of how rushed people are. After my usual crazy last minute dash for groceries with my children, I was reversing the car out and I noticed a man in a wheelchair going into the grocery store. His wheelchair got caught on something and he tumbled over and fell to the ground. Half way out of my parking spot, I stopped. There were a lot ofpeople around “Quick someone help him” my head was saying. The kids yelling “Mum that poor man is on the ground”. In an instant my world slowed down. People were stepping over the man, people walked around the man, people avoided the man full stop. “Shit, I’m in a rush, someone STOP and help this guy please” my inner voice bellowed loudly in my head. Yet no one stopped. Re-parking the car, grabbing the kids we raced to the man. The kids picked up his wheelchair and we helped the man into it. He thanked us profusely, I apologised on behalf of those who had ignored him “So sorry no one helped you”. The talk with my children after this incident was so very real as to the race we all partake in, it is part of life, we are all busy, all rushing, all racing to an unknown finishing line. Mr 7 “Mum why did no one help that man?”. A simple question with many answers.
Are we that rushed that we step over someone who has fallen? Are we that rushed that we feel we should tut and voice our disgust at a mother whose child is throwing a tantrum? Are we that rushed that we forget to say Thank you or I’m sorry. Does everything have to be now?
A little more patience with children
How to teach your child to read in 5 steps. How to teach your child to tie laces in one day. How to teach your child subtraction in two hours. We are also rushing children to learn and learning again is not a race. These books can be helpful but are not a necessity, children are very apt at learning at the pace that is right for them. Great that Milly can tie her laces at four, Tom who is six is still learning to tie his laces but he can set a dinner table. Children get engrossed in the moment, they learn through fun and play. It does not all come from text books. It comes from life. Instilling confidence, resilience and values is making the adult of tomorrow, not racing to learn how to do up laces. Love and patience are fundamentals with children.
Childhood is not a race, it has a set course of time which may not feel super fast as you live it but as I look at my teenage daughter who will be seventeen in January and in her last year at school, her years flash through my head at a supersonic speed, my baby girl is a woman and I’m still not quite sure when that happened.
How to be more patient and kind